When you discipline your children, you are teaching them what behavior you expect and what is appropriate. The ultimate goal of discipline is to teach a child self discipline. The keys to effective discipline are setting limits for children and communicating those expectations.

• Distract the child.
  Redirect the child and ignore undesired behavior.
• Ignore the misbehavior.
  Continue doing what you are doing without any verbal or physical indications to acknowledge the misbehavior.
• Structure the environment.
  Arrange objects and spaces to help children learn self-control and respect for property.
• Control the situation, not the child.
  Set guidelines or limits and give the child choices within your limits.
• Involve the child through choices and consequences.
  Giving children choices empowers them and helps them develop independence and cooperation
• Let your child do things.
  Show confidence in your child’s ability to make choices and handle challenges that are appropriate to his or her age.
• Be consistent.
  Treating the misbehavior the same way each time helps your child learn what to expect when he or she misbehaves.
• Praise positive behavior.
  Notice and comment on positive or desired behavior. Try to say yes more than no.
• Time-outs.
  Use time outs as a last resort when a child needs to calm down and regain control of himself or herself.
• The rewards of discipline.
  Remember, you are teaching your children when you discipline them. Using positive discipline is a challenge, but well worth the effort. Always keep in mind the true meaning of discipline – to guide children and provide positive models for dealing with problems.

Source: Jewish Family Service of St. Paul, 651-698-0767, www.jfssp.org

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